Couple In Conversation Resized For Web

When You're Not on the Same Page

Article Type: Biblical Stewardship

One of the amazing things about marriage is how God pairs very different people with different ideas together. This is both a strength and a challenge!

This is especially true in estate planning. One person may have a strong opinion on how their wealth should be transferred, whereas the other person has significant anxiety. Likewise, couples may have diverging viewpoints on what and how much should be given to their children.

If estate planning is a challenging conversation in your home, it’s no surprise. You’re in good company! 

Here are four steps to help you move past your differences and toward the completion of an effective plan.

1. Call it out. This is a difficult topic and likely very emotional. Acknowledge this from the get-go, and commit to honoring and listening to one another throughout the process.

2. Establish shared values. You have faith and values that have become the bedrock of your marriage and parenthood. Take a step back from the expected distribution plan and assess what you really want to accomplish and model to your loved ones. 

3. Identify the areas of difference or concern. Where do you see things differently? More importantly, why? Listen carefully and seek to understand. 

4. Explore creative solutions. Look for the planning solutions that support your shared values and help you achieve your goals. 

These conversations are often best had with a planning professional experienced in guiding couples through these difficult topics – someone who understands the planning tools available, but also shares their values and approaches planning from a Kingdom perspective. This is how Barnabas Foundation planners can assist you.


If you and your spouse would like to have a confidential conversation with someone who understands tax-wise charitable planning from a distinctly Christian worldview, email info@BarnabasFoundation.com or call 888.448.3040.