Seeking Counsel - Outline I. We need to learn to ask for advise & truly listen to others before making financial decisions. II. Beware of Emotions in Decision Making: Excitement - see how much the monthly payment is & convince ourselves it's doable. Fear- afraid to live without something so we look to buy on credit III. We need to thoughtfully, prayerfully consider our purchases.  Ask someone with wisdom or maturity, especially a fellow Christian, to help prevent unwise financial decisions. IV. Roadblocks of Seeking Counsel: We are taught in our society not to depend on anyone else & that the ultimate goal is to do what we want when we want without anyone telling us what to do. Finances are thought to be a ?personal issue?.  We don't want to reveal to others our income, what we spend and on what things, our investment in the future. V. God teaches us through Proverbs that the foolish thing in life is to think we don't need to ask for advice.  Prov. 15:22- ?Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.? Although financial advice is widely available, what are some more reasons we do not seek counsel? PRIDE- Began with the devil & today we struggle with the same sin. FEAR OF LOOKING STUPID - not wanting others to find out that you're not sure of the best way to handle something. FEAR OF WHAT ADVICE OTHERS WILL GIVE- We don't want to hear that it may be best to do without something or to make difficult changes. BUSYNESS- It takes time & effort to get counsel.  Also we are afraid if we don't jump on it at that moment, it may be gone.  That may be God's way of protecting you from a poor decision. IGNORANCE- Even though much advice is out there, we don't know how to access it or unsure what sources are trustworthy, so we either don't find any counsel or we seek the wrong kind of counsel. VI. ??with many advisers they succeed.?  If we believe this, then we need to seek the right counsel.  From whom should we seek counsel? YOUR SPOUSE (If married)- A gift from God & part of how we honor our spouse is to seek, listen & be willing to implement their advice.  Work together as a team to plan your finances. PARENTS- Use their experience/their struggles, their mistakes, their successes. EXPERTS- Seek a competent, knowledgeable expert.  However, we still need to test that advice or counsel from the world against the truths of God's Word and God's ways. FELLOW CHRISTIANS- Build friendships and relationships within the Christian community. JESUS- More than anyone else, we need to be in prayer with Jesus.  Going to church, reading & studying our Bilbe, and praying and asking for Jesus? guidance.  He has a plan for our lives??a plan for good and not for evil?.  When we become Christians, we no longer live for ourselves, but for our Savior, Jesus Christ.  He cares just as much about what we do with our finances as with the rest of our lives.

Seeking Counsel - Sermon Sermon: Seeking Counsel - 3 of 4 AL BREEMS, Pastor Text: Proverbs 15:22 We return again today to a series of messages talking about the need for us especially as Christians to find a way out of, and not our way or the way of the world around us, but God's way out of the trap of debt. Thus far I have been speaking about some things that the Bible teaches us to do that will help not just with debt that is in many areas of our lives, but first to be willing to work hard for what we get and not depend on credit or lenders to provide for our needs. The second thing I spoke about last week was to be willing to live lives that are honest and have integrity. If we don't have the money, don't sign on the line and promise that we will do that. Be honest. Today, I'd like to turn to a third thing taught in the Bible which I believe also will make a difference in the battle against debt, and that is to be willing to seek counsel. We need to be willing to ask for advice and truly listen to what others think before we take the leap and jump into financial obligations. As I mentioned before one of the dangers that gets us into trouble when it comes to debt is that we let emotions drive us in our decision making. Either we see things and they excite us, and all we research, the only counsel we get is how much will the monthly payments be? And then out of our emotions, we begin to attempt to convince ourselves that "Hey, I can do this. Yea, maybe I have to stretch a little, but hey, only $375 a month. That's very doable." Or on the other hand it's not the emotion of excitement that drives us but the emotion of fear, we get afraid that we have to live without something, and so we look to credit to solve it. Before we know it, we have locked ourselves into something financially that begins to take on the form of bondage or slavery in our lives. Had we been willing to take the time or make the effort to ask someone else who has the wisdom or maturity, especially in the ways of the Lord, whether we should do this or not and been willing to consider thoughtfully and prayerfully what they advise. Sadly again, from the day we step foot in this society, especially if we are a male, we are taught that the worst thing we could do with our lives is become dependent on anyone else in this world. That the ultimate goal or purpose in life is to be able to do what we want to do when we want to do it without anyone else telling us what to do. Haven't you heard people talk about that? "Oh, if only I could get to a point in life where nobody would tell me what to do." As is the case with so many other things that he tells us, I believe that thought--that the ultimate goal in life is to get to a point where we don't have anyone telling us what to do--is a lie from the devil. As we will see in this passage this morning, that is not what God recommends for our lives. Over and over again in the Bible, especially here in the book of Proverbs, which was called "wisdom literature"--a book which was designed to teach a very specific type of wisdom about life, God's wisdom--it is taught very clearly that the stupid thing to do in life, the foolish thing, is to get to the point where you think you don't need to ask for advice. Whereas on the other hand, the message that comes through loudly and clearly both in this passage and others is that the wise thing, the more intelligent thing in life to do, is to get to a point where not only do we admit that we don't know it all or that we can't figure it all out in life, but we get to a point where we humble ourselves and ask for help or advice from others. And as I said earlier, one of the areas where we need to learn to ask for advice perhaps more than any other is in the area of finances. In many ways, finances have become what we call a "personal issue." Understandably, who wants to reveal to others your income or what we spend on certain things or what we have done or not done to invest for the future? There is a real temptation to want to keep it all to ourselves. We fool ourselves into thinking and feeling that it's better that way, safer. Yet, just as is true in other parts of our lives, so it is in the area of finances. The more try to handle our finances on our own, the more we think we have a right to do what we want when we want without needing to consult anyone else or ask for advice, the more set ourselves up for failure. Whereas I am convinced that this truth of God for our lives in general also applies to our financial lives--that the more we are willing to ask for advice, to seek counsel, especially what would be called godly counsel, advice from a God honoring point of view--the more we are going to avoid the pitfalls and traps. We will avoid the decisions that can so easily put us in positions of bondage and destroy or make miserable our lives. So with that mind, I'd to read this simple proverb, Proverbs 15:22 this morning ?Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.?. As you can see, the proverb, as is the case in many of them, was written with two parts. It took the form of what I would call the on-the-one-hand-this but on-the-other-hand-that format. The first half of the proverb teaches the truth that we need to seek counsel from the negative point of view. The second half of the proverb teaches this truth of God from the positive point of view. But on both sides of the coin, God is trying to urge us here to see the value of counsel. Now, what I'd like to do is as we take a look at the first half of the proverb, where it says "Plans fail for lack of counsel?, what I'd like to do is to talk about why it is that we lack counsel in our lives. The problem is not that there is lack of counsel in our society today. As a matter of fact, we live in the information age. It's the way in which this age of history has been characterized. Never before in the history of the world has there been so much information, so much counsel available through the Internet, through the mass media, TV, radio, CD's DVD's, there is a wealth of information that is available to us. And this is particularly true when it comes the amount of counsel or advice or information that is available to us in the area of money or finances. There are perhaps more magazines written to give financial advice than there are to give advice for your love life. There are TV shows on cable where there is constant barrage of commentators giving financial advice and stations on the radio that do the same. Even the nightly news is doing segments on financial advice. So why is it we so often lack advice? Well, the reason is not because it isn't out there. The reason most often, I believe, is because of things within us, and what I'd like to do is talk about a few of those things this morning. What is it that causes a lack of counsel in our lives? Well, the first barrier is perhaps the most obvious, pride. In every one of us, there is the sin of pride. It is believed actually to be the very first sin in this world. When Eve ate the forbidden fruit from the tree in the garden, do you remember why she did it? I spoke about it last week. It was because the devil had tricked her into thinking that if she ate that fruit she would become like God. So why would she want to become like God? Pride. And actually, she wasn't even the first to commit this sin. The devil himself, the Bible tells us, was created as an angel to worship and praise God, but he fell into the sin of pride. And out of pride, he convinced a whole host of angels to join him in a rebellion against God. So is it any wonder that you and I would struggle with the same sin? And even though it's found in differing degrees within each of us, we all suffer from the sin of pride. We all think we know more at times or that we are more able at times to do things than are actually true. I know that men especially struggle with the sin of pride. There's the age old joke about guys looking for a place and will go to great lengths not to ask for directions. Why? They're too proud, right? But, I also believe men have not cornered the market on pride. There are plenty of you ladies who at times don't like or want to hear anyone tell you what to do. So, pride is one of the reasons why we lack counsel in our lives, especially our financial lives. It's not the only reason. Another reason I believe is fear. And this one affects us in a couple of ways, I believe, when it comes to our finances. For one thing, part of why we don't ask for advice is because we are afraid to look stupid. Guys, let's be honest, we don't like to look like there are things we don't know about in this world, right? Why? Well deep down I believe it is because we are afraid that people will think we look stupid. So we keep our mouths shut. We don't ask for advice because then even though we are stupid, even though there are plenty of things we don't know about our don't know how to handle or fix in this world, at least they--those people out there--aren't going to find out. And then even more foolishly we think this is such a smart plan, but look at Proverbs 15:22, "Plans fail because of lack of counsel." Ladies, I would ask you. Have there been times where you have out fear hidden things from your husband? It's not that uncommon. Many ladies do it, and they do it out of fear. Fear that he will find out and get mad. Fear that he will find out and cut her off from her security blanket of the credit card, or just fear that he or someone will find out just how stupid she feels about herself. And yet, as I said, this fear causes great failure financially. I also believe that part of the fear is a fear of what kind of advice others will give us. I really believe at times we know things we are doing financially are wrong or unwise, but we also know that to do the right thing will mean giving up something or making difficult changes, letting go of or living without things, and we are afraid. So again out of fear we avoid the counsel. Now, a third barrier to counsel I believe is not pride or fear, but just plain busyness. It takes effort. It takes time to get counsel. Part of the reason why we don't get it is we're too busy running around doing this or that. We don't ever make the time to sit down and read an article, listen to a show, research the Internet, make an appointment, call up a Christian friend and ask. At times what often happens is, I believe, the enemy loves to use urgency to get us to bypass counsel financially. We're told, "Hey, if you don't act on this now, if you don't jump on this, if you don't lock this in right now... then you're going to lose out big time." Please take note, 9 times out of 10, if you hear someone say something like that to you, step back, do not jump on it. Trust the Lord by doing what He tells you here, seeking counsel first, and then make your decision. If it's gone, it was not meant to be, and trust that the Lord was protecting you. Don't let busyness keep you from counsel. And lastly, I believe there's another reason why we don't seek counsel and that is just plain ignorance. Although as I said earlier, we live in the information age, and although there is perhaps more info out there about finances than anything else, many times I believe we don't also know how to access it or what sources are more trustworthy than others. And so either we don't find any counsel or we seek the wrong kind of counsel. Which brings me to the second part of this proverb, if we are going to be obedient to the Lord, if we are going to believe what it says in the second half of this proverb that with many advisers plans are more apt to succeed, then it is important for us to realize that not just any adviser, not just any counsel will do. There are key people according to the Bible to whom I believe we need to learn to go to seek advice or counsel for our lives including our finances. And what I'd like to do is list a few of them this morning. One of them is the person from whom we often like to hear advice the least, and yet this person is one of the best sources of advice in our lives. If you are married, it is your spouse. My poor wife will say to me, "Why is it when so-and-so says that same thing to you I've been saying for years, now all of a sudden you listen?" Ever have that happen? It's hard sometimes to hear our spouse tell us what to do. Sometimes I think we think, "Well, if I admit he or she's right, they'll never stop telling me what to do." So out of principle we resist or get most defensive when it is our spouse who's giving us advice. And when it comes to finances, there is usually one in the couple who's much better than the other at handling the family books, so to speak. And there is a temptation, therefore, for the one never to discuss or never to ask input from the other. Men probably do this more with their wives, but I've met plenty of wives who do all the banking and never discuss things with their husband. And many times they don't want to get his or her advice because then they can do what they want to do, like racking up more debt. But truth is our spouse is a gift from God, and part of the way we honor our spouse is to seek and listen and be willing to implement their advice. Too many wives who were kept in the dark about finances after their husband dies don't have a clue how to deal with finances or find out awful truths about the financial mess that their husband left them. And it is important for us as couples to seek counsel from one another, to discuss the family finances even when they cause tension, to pray to ask the Lord to give us kind and soft spirits to work together as a team to come up with a plan for how to spend and not spend our money. Now, that's one source of counsel. If you are single, don't worry, there are plenty more for us to consider and listen to when it comes to counsel in finances and otherwise in life. Here's a second source of counsel, one which when we get older we forget about but often can be very valuable, parents. What makes parents qualify to give us financial advice? It's very simple, experience. One of the ways in which parents can help is that they've had their own struggles, made their own mistakes. And you know what? You're never too old to call Dad or Mom and ask their advice. Are there times where our parents are going to give us poor advice? Absolutely, they're human, and some of us know by now that our finances are not the strength of our parents, and therefore we cannot seek counsel in this area from them. That doesn't mean there aren't other areas to seek their advice and that doesn't mean if our parents can't help us that there aren't other people to whom we can go for advice. I do believe that another source of counsel or advice are those whom I would call experts. Who are the experts? Well, these are people who have studied their own experiences and drawn upon the wealth of knowledge from the experiences of others, and have specialized in gaining knowledge in a certain area. When possible, I recommend seeking an expert who is both competent, knowledgeable and who is a Christian. However, in certain circumstances, I would even recommend an expert who may not be a Christian, but has gained great knowledge. As Christians, I do believe it's OK for us to learn from the knowledge of the world around us. We need to test that knowledge and advice or counsel we get from the world against the standards and truths of God's Word and God's ways. We need to check ourselves against the number 1 motive of the world when it comes to finances, namely greed. But that doesn't mean there aren?t things to learn from the so-called experts, and reading, talking, listening to and researching what is being taught about wise, responsible handling of our finances I believe is covered when it says with many advisers, plans succeed. Now having said that, I also believe that another group we need to seek for counsel in finances and elsewhere is definitely Christians--other brothers and sisters in Christ. It's OK to talk to the experts and to family, but we also need one another as Christians. And this is where we need to build some friendships and relationships where we get to know each other, where going to church, attending a Bible study is important. Now, is there anyone I have left off in terms of people we need to consult about our financial lives and other parts of our lives? I hope you have noticed that I have left the best for last, There is still someone we need to consult more than anyone else--someone who loves us more than even our spouse or children or parents or fellow Christians. Someone who loved us so much He left heaven for us, came to this earth, lived not just a good life but a perfect life, and died a horrible death as a payment for our sins. The one who not only cares about our plans but has a plan for our lives, a plan for good and not for evil says the Bible. More than anyone else, the one we need to consult, to seek counsel from is Jesus. Let me remind you. When we become Christians, one of the changes that takes place is that we no longer live for ourselves, but we begin to live for the one who lived and died for us, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. And Jesus cares just as much about what we do with our finances as with the rest of our lives. He is just as concerned about whether we are going to drift into debt as we are, probably more so. And that's where the more we cut ourselves off from going to church, reading and studying our Bible, and most importantly praying and asking for guidance with our financial lives, then we cut ourselves from the counsel we need most, the counsel that Jesus sends to us through the Holy Spirit. Of all the counsel, of all the advisers that we need to be listening too and consulting, there is none more important than Jesus. If you are struggling, the best and first place to go is to Him.

4-Part Series by Al Breems - Index Continue on to "Giving"